


I got no nuts to tell the one I love

by Rafaperez



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Grief/Mourning, Samwena, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-22 15:49:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22085020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rafaperez/pseuds/Rafaperez
Summary: Post 15X04 and 14x14. Sam drives without a direction as he reminds about a moment that Rowena and him had a year ago and about everything he never told her.
Relationships: Rowena MacLeod/Sam Winchester
Kudos: 13





	I got no nuts to tell the one I love

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy

_I got no nuts to tell the one I love_

_That she's the reason that I wrote this song_

_And that's some coward shit I know it sucks_

_But call me when you hear this on_

**Human-Jon Bellion**

Although they had just returned from a werewolf case and faced Lilith Sam just couldn't stay in his bedroom or at the bunker, his nightmares still hitting him as the memories of everyone he'd lost. Jessica, his parents, Jack. Rowena. And thinking about the redhead who had died at his hand made the hunter grip hard the steering wheel until his knuckles went white, frowning as his eyes which were on the road filled with tears.

Thinking about Rowena hurt him more, thinking about her sly smiles, her voice full of life, her touches and then her words to him _we've gotten quite fond of each other_ because in her case he'd never told her what he felt for the witch as he'd watched her walk toward the rupture bleeding.

"Because I'm a coward..." Sam murmured hoarsely, feeling defeated as his eyes became more blurry and he covered his mouth with one hand frustrated at himself.

How could he had let her go without ever telling her he was fond of her too? That he liked her? With all the time he'd had to say that? Why not during that afternoon at the vet, why hadn't he been more brave?

The hunter shook his head as the images from that afternoon invaded him making his heart break even more and then his hand fell to the steering wheel again holding it tighter as he accelerated but he didn't know to where, his GPS was turned on but he wasn't paying attention to that. His mind was in Rowena Macleod, his girlfriend.

They had been together for some months now, since the day Rowena had kept the rift open so Sam and the others could return from the apocalyptic world but during this time they had never talked about what they felt, the silence in each other's arms was comfortable and always translated the desire they felt so they never talked. Rowena had difficulties to open up and Sam... he wasn't brave enough.

The two left the vet as soon as the doctor had taken Jack inside and now Rowena had a smirk on her face, laying against the wall of the vet outside staring at Sam who still seemed a little nervous at their acting inside there.

"Oh Samuel my dear, it isn't as if we were really acting, right?" She teased him still with a smile on her red lops as she took a hand to his shoulder brushing away his brown hair from his neck and running her fingers through his strands of hair making him tremble slightly with her touch as she stared at him watching his handsome face and strong chest where she liked be, so close to him.

"Ro..." He sighed in a warning tune but seeing her face softening and her hand slowing leaving him Sam stopped her as his eyes shone with tenderness for her because it was difficult for him to stay frustrated at the redhead and he felt her fingers start to gently caress his hair again, relaxing him and he gave her a small smile admitting nervously:

"It's just that back there inside it was the fist time we really acknowledged it."

"Oh..." Rowena stared at his hazel eyes as she but at her lower lip feeling her cheeks flush slightly.

Talking about feelings wasn't easy for her after centuries being hurt by men and then using them to get what she wanted and even now knowing Sam was different, that he treated her so well and made her heart beat fast for him, it wasn't easy.

"You look beautiful when you're nervous, little witch." Sam murmured with love taking a hand to her beautiful face and raising her chin before slipping his large fingers through her delicate and flushed face until he started caressing her behind the ear exposed by her ponytail as he watched her eyelashes flutter with his touch.

"Stop teasing me giant." Rowena murmured almost breathless as she felt his other hand hand go to her waist approaching her and pressing her against the vet's wall and she stared at him with passion, her green eyes darker with desire and exigent as she took both arms around his neck in expectation and he smiled, kissing her with passion.

The kiss was slow and loaded with passion as Sam pressed his large and warm chest to Rowena's small and delicate one giving her that feeling of safeness as they parted their lips and their tongues met, her fingers stating to caress the hair on his nape gently, their lips pressing until they were breathless.

When they broke the kiss they smiled and Sam brought her to his chest holding her and feeling his his melt as she laid her head there and Rowena kept smiling feeling so good there and they stayed holding each other for some time until Jack appeared and they pulled away.

When Sam realized where he was, he saw he was in front of an ancient building and then he stopped the car still holding the steering wheel as he stared at a window where all the lights were off and he knew they would stay like that. Because it was from Rowena's apartment and even wandering without a direction his body and heart had lead him there and for a long time he stared at the place which now was his and he shook his head slightly murmuring with a sad smile, touched as he finally admitted those words aloud, tired of being a coward:

"We've gotten quite fond of each other, Rowena."


End file.
